It’s 5am. I’ve been awake since around 4:30. I finally gave up on sleep and came out to watch the news and have some chai.

The reason I’m awake. My sinuses have picked this week to literally explode with snot. I had allergy attacks last fall, but nothing compared to this. This is like someone took a fireman’s hose and shot my sinus cavities full of junk; so full I can’t breath. So full my head hurts on the side that’s clogged up. So full I can’t even inhale the little spritz from my nasal spray.

My eyes and throat, not wanting to be left out of the whole facial action, are itchy, watery and dry, all at once. How is that possible??

Yeah. I’m miserable. But I feel the sorriest for the people around me at work, who have to listen to me sneeze and cough all day long, look at my Rudolf-red nose and my squinty wet eyes and wonder, sometimes in fear, if this thing is catching.

Nothing I take has worked on this snot-fest. I’ve taken anti-histamine, decongestant, cough drops, stuff declaring it takes care of even the most stubborn allergies, stuff labeled "for severe cold"…. you name it, I’ve taken it. Nothing. Works.

Oh, someone shoot me now and put me out of my misery before I explode all over Nashville, shooting snot clear up to White House and all the way down to Spring Hill. Heck, I think I could even reach Pigeon Forge with what’s packed up my nose….

Help.