Monthly Archives: July 2005

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In Memory of A Friend

I found out this morning that my friend, Helen Harris, died yesterday morning of breast cancer. She’d been fighting a battle with it for over 5 years. She was a wonderful woman, with a bubbly warm personality and a loving heart. She was so young, still — and had so many years of life and love ahead of her!

She never knew it, but she was an inspiration to me. Her battle with cancer and refusal to give up hope, often believing in healing against impossible odds, inspired and challenged me to keep going. If she could do it, with all she had to face, I can most certainly do it.

Please pray for Helen’s family, my friends Wendy, Conna, Debbie, and so many others who were touched by Helen’s life and miss her dearly.

For a couple of pictures, see Wendy’s blog.

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Dust

I saw a great little DVD called "Dust" last night. Rob Bell talked about being a rabbi’s disciple and what it really means. It was so rich with gold dust, things I’ve heard and yet never knew, things I’d been taught but never understood and things I’d forgotten in the passion of following Jesus.

Like this passage, "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matt 29:11)

I’ve never really understood that. Someone last night joked that when they were a kid they thought Jesus was talking about egg-yokes. I always pictured one of those wooden things you use to connect two oxen or cows or something together to pull something. You know, the things that look like a guillotine noose, just minus the blade. Nice image to associate with Jesus….

But Rob Bell explained that back in the time that Jesus lived, Rabbi’s often took on disciples. No, they chose disciples. One had to be chosen to be a disciple of a rabbi. And The rabbi chose disciples he believed could learn all that he knew and become like him. It became a saying of a rabbi to his disciple to "take my yoke", which literally meant "become like me." It had less to do with "slavery" or "being bound" to something — as today’s teachings often tell us — than it had to do with learning and becoming.

When you became a rabbi’s disciple, you followed him wherever he went. Often, at the end of the day you would be caked in the mud and dirt of all the places your rabbi had been. It was seen as a mark of a true disciple and a saying arose, "May you be covered in the dust of your rabbi."

I recently found Matt 11:29 in the Message "version" (whatever its called). "Walk with me and work with me–watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly." This really gets that point across; that Jesus, our Rabbi, our Teacher as well as God and Savior and Redeemer and Lord, is inviting us to be like Him. Not just to follow Him, obey Him, learn from Him, but be like Him.

I remember as a child learning that I could be "like" Jesus — that I "should" be like Jesus. But in the same breath, I was told no one will ever be like Jesus because we are just human and He is God. What my child’s mind took away from those lessons is that, while I "should" strive to be like Jesus, I should never expect to be like Him.

As I listened to Rob Bell on that DVD, heard him repeat again, "The rabbi doesn’t choose you unless he thinks you can be like him." I heard Jesus whisper to me, "are you listening? Do you hear? Do you believe? Will you believe?"

Rob went on to explain that when Peter stepped out of the boat and into the water, he was proving he really was a disciple of his rabbi. He was determined to be like his rabbi and do what his rabbi did. If Jesus was walking on the water, then Peter wanted to.

When Peter started to sink, Jesus caught him and gently asked, "why did you doubt?" Who was Peter doubting? Not, Jesus — Jesus wasn’t sinking. He didn’t doubt Jesus, his rabbi, could walk on the water. Peter doubted himself. He doubted that he could do what his Rabbi did. Remember, rabbis chose their disciples based on a confidence the rabbi had that the disciple could be like him.

As Rob explained this, I again heard Jesus whisper, "Do you hear that? Are you listening? Do you believe? I believe. I have faith you can."
These two passages have been rattling around my spirit for several weeks now. God keeps pulling me back to them over and over and I finally see the connection between the two. I see what Jesus wants me learn right now:

I can be like Him. He. Chose. Me. He chose me because He knew I could be like Him. Jesus has faith in me. Isn’t that the weirdest thing you’ve ever heard??? Jesus has faith in US. Jesus has faith that we can follow Him and that we can be like Him. Not just obey. Not just follow. Not just journey together. But be like Him.

Rob Bell closed the study guide with the following words. They have echoed in my heart and spirit since I first read them:

"May you believe in God. But may you come to see that God believes in you. May you have faith in Jesus. But may you come to see that Jesus has faith that you can be like him. A person of love and compassion and truth. A person of forgiveness, and peace, and grace, and joy, and hope. And may you be covered in the dust of your rabbi, Jesus."

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“Doing Life Together”

Is it just me, or is this phrase getting old?

I know. I’m being heretical here. Especially for people in the emerging church genre. It’s just… well, maybe I’m just getting old and jaded.

But it seems to me that "Doing life together" is the new hip thing to say/do, like it’s cousin, the Hollywood "doing lunch" thing. Doing lunch wasn’t always empty of real relationship, but often it was. People said, "Let’s do lunch!" and that usually meant a nice meal and lots of conversation – ranging from "doing a deal" to finessing a relationship for a future opportunity to "do a deal".

I get the same feeling from ‘let’s do life together’. It’s the new church-speak. And it feels as churchy to me as "I’ll pray for you". Not that either of those things is bad, they just don’t feel sincere. I realize there are some who truly are sincere when they say these things. I’m not talking about them. I’m talking about the rest of us who started using it as a short-hand and now it’s just a "bless-you"-after-someone-sneezes kind of reaction-phrase. We say it, but it’s lost its meaning.

Do a Google search on "doing life together" and you’ll come up with pages and pages — I quit after about 50. And still I don’t have a good idea what it means.

Life Groups I know. Community I know. Our oikos’ (our sphere of influence) I know. Challenging each other to walk along side of people, to enter their world and leave an imprint on them in the name of Jesus, simply by being who God created us to be; Encouraging one another to make disciples — to invite people to join us on our journey with Jesus and then teach them what Jesus has taught us — and to be disciples of Jesus ourselves, and to be mentors and mentorees; developing friendships, not just the casual kind, but the deep, rich, healthy relationships that last many years and are marked by conflict, forgiveness, humility and grace — these things I know. These things I want to do.

But "doing life together"…What is that? What does it mean, really? What does it look like? What does it feel like? Can you tell me?

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India’s Big Screen Ideas for Jesus Followers

The price for following Jesus in India just went up.

Big-screen infomercial in India discourages conversions – (BP)

The president of the Indian Association of Producers, Artists and Technicians of Short Films and Television Programs, Devendra Khandelwal, said the public service-type short film was made to “educate” cinema audiences about Gujarat’s Freedom of Religion Act of 2003, Compass reported. The law prohibits conversion “by the use of force or allurement or by fraudulent means.”

As described by Compass, the act stipulates that would-be converts must obtain permission from district officials before they convert. Priests or religious officials also must contact district authorities before a conversion takes place. Failure to comply with these requirements can lead to imprisonment for up to four years and a maximum fine of 100,000 rupees ($2,294).

What people don’t get is that the cost of "conversion" is much higher than any monetary price. If not handled properly and with respect for the familial ties, especially one’s elders, the price is exclusion from one’s own family, community and society.

What India needs is not more Christian "converts". What it needs is Hindu Christ devotees, who worship only Jesus because He has proven He is worthy of exclusive devotion; and because of their love and commitment to Him they honor their families, their culture, their heritage and their country. Only then will the great news of Abundant Life in Christ spread across India.

I wonder what the American Church — we who claim to follow Jesus in this country — would look like if we had this obstacle?

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“Hidden” Talent

Your Hidden Talent
You have the power to persuade and influence others.
You’re the type of person who can turn a whole room around.
The potential for great leadership is there, as long as you don’t abuse it.
Always remember, you have a lot more power over people than you might think!
Your Hidden Talent
You have the natural talent of rocking the boat, thwarting the system.
And while this may not seem big, it can be.
It’s people like you who serve as the catalysts to major cultural changes.
You’re just a bit behind the scenes, so no one really notices.
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Ragamuffin Soul

A special shout out to Carlos Whittaker, Ragamuffin Soul who somehow found me in the vastness of the internet (two Riverside, CA "children" blogging our journeys with Jesus) and blogrolled me as someone he reads every day.

Wow.

I’m honored Carlos! Especially knowing that a busy musician/worship pastor/husband/father has many other things he could be doing with his time.

May all that you do for the Kingdom, and every place your feet land be blessed and consecrated for God’s most amazing purpose.

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Being Real with Ourselves

I found this blog, Being Real with Ourselves by following a link from my stats report. Neal Christopher is a pastor at a church called Sandals in my high school hometown of Riverside.

I really like the title of his blog. It just struck a cord with me the moment I first stepped "into" it. So often in my life I have not been real with myself! How can I be real with others if I can’t even be so with the one human being who knows me inside and out — ME?

And if I can’t be real with me, how can I be real with God? If I’m hiding from myself, who knows all (or at least most) of my secrets (some I’ve hidden so well, I no longer "remember" them) but is biased and subjective enough to always see things "my way" —if I can’t be real with such a biased audience, then of course I’m going to hide from the One, the only One, who can see all of me, who knows my every thought before I do, and knows even the secrets I’ve hidden from myself, and Who is not subjective and biased, but Just and Righteous.

"Being Real With Ourselves." I want that. I want that kind of community. I’m trying to be that now. It’s hard to break a lifetime habit of running. But I like the freedom I experience when I stop running and just get real.

You’ve got all things suspended
All things connected
Nothing was forgotten
Your love was perfect
You are Healer and
You know what’s broken
We’re not a mystery to you.

Mended – by Nathan and Christy Nockels

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I Don’t Know What I’m Doing

But I’m moving forward anyway.

I’ve been looking around for new places to live. And I haven’t been paying too close attention to my budget to know if I really "should" be looking at places that expensive. Heck, I have a couple of months before I need to move, I guess I could afford a little time to dream (Wendy, are you sure you don’t want to move out here???).

I long for a community, especially one with some of my peers in it. I know that probably sounds retarded, but, well, it’s just that it would be so nice to have some older women here in Nashville I could actually hang out with. I miss my girlfriends back in LA. Women like Wendy, Kat, Leticia, Kim, Kim South, Rachel, Holly, Kristin, Joyce, Deb — and Conna!!!! (who’s no longer in LA). I miss being able to be with women who really understand and get where I’m at in life. Women who get me. Women I can feel comfortable with and just let my hair down; who get my jokes and movie references because they actually saw those movies in the theatre. —- Wow. I never thought I’d say such things. I sound so old, don’t I.

I guess that’s the truth I’ve realized recently. I really am old. At least compared to all these young girls around me at Mosaic Nashville. Youn 20s, some still in college, or just recently out. To them life is fresh and ripe with possibilities. They’re too young to understand crushed dreams, major heartbreak and the crashing in of reality and time. Oh, they think they have. I remember those days. Every new lesson from God was an earthshattering event. Every break up or crush that didn’t reciprocate was cause for deep soul-searching as to what was wrong with me (or him) that it didn’t work out. I was focused on God and living out my dreams and thought I knew pretty much all I needed to know. And every single woman around 40 was a person to be pitied and avoided. Pitied for her sad situation in life and avoided so I wouldn’t have to think about the possibility that I might end up just like her.

But then I got older. My 30s arrived and I started truly appreciating all that older women have to offer. I miss women like Karin, Carol, Kristin, Norma, Laura and Kim who were older and wiser than me and poured into me, gave me such sound counsel and encouragement. Its been hard to be the oldest woman in the group. Heck, the oldest person in the group. And I’m not even 40 yet.

I want to find some community with real women, not young girls still dreaming of womanhood. —No offense to all you 20-somethings out there.

I have found one woman friend, and I think I found another this weekend. It was so good to talk to someone older than me that could understand and relate to all I’ve gone through!! Two is a good start, don’t you think?

So off I go. Into God knows what. Looking for God knows what.

I hope I find it.